You know those moments, when you know exactly what you're supposed to do, when you can picture it perfectly, step by step, when it's as vivid in your mind's eye as if it's played out in live action right in front of you?
Damn frustrating when you just can't seem to maneuver your body parts to all move in the right places at the right times and follow all the instructions that your brain is practically screaming at them, especially when the instructions sound so simple and straight forward resonating against your skull, right?
I find it completely amusing, and maybe not surprising at all, that my riding trainer and voice teacher have much of the same things to say.
My upper body needs to back the hell off and calm the fuck down.
I meticulously analyzed several videos of Meredith Michaels-Beerbaum, one of my go-to idols for references as top examples of great equitation. It's starting to make more and more sense, watching her posture, position, seat, legs, and carriage, integrated with all the things that Karly has been stressing at my lessons. Directly related are Jennifer's observations of my overall bodily tension, which is quite literally all over the place, but mostly concentrated in my upper body. Arms, chest, shoulders, neck, even head. Tension gathered from sources that I had never even thought of before, such as the ways I drive and carry my backpack. Tension that has become more natural to my body than relaxation over many, many years of terrible habits and negative instincts, that I don't even know it's there anymore. My upper body doesn't seem to want to stay out of the way for anything and leave my core free to do its job. It happens when I sing, and it happens when I ride. It always wants to help, and it's almost become a reflexive fight or flight response, constantly on alert, whether the call for a defensive mechanism is real or not.
And I'm willing to bet that Candy feels every bit of it when I'm on her. All the time.
Tuesday was not one of my successful practice ride days. It was relatively hot in the afternoon, and for whatever reasons, Candy decided to be a brat again. I resorted back to a bridle with a flash and bit guards, refusing to end the day with her tug-o-war game. But honestly, it was probably mostly me, again. My tension, my lack of flexibility in my middle and lower body, my forgetting to breathe, my tightness in all the places that should never be clenched when I'm on a moving horse. Coupled with the heat, and the fact that I should expect a restless, impatient horse after another whole week of no work, it wasn't the most fun time for me. Yes, I realize that I need to ride more often, and that it's not a good idea to ride two days in a row, and then not ride again until a week later. That and maybe I'm rushing the warming up time. Also, my fault for allowing myself to slip out of shape again. When was the last time I did yoga? So, at least two yoga classes this week, no excuses. How can I expect Candy to be in better shape, when her rider isn't keeping up with her side of it?
I need to retrain my body, as well as my brain. Muscle memory takes time to build, and even more time to undo and redo.
I know, I know, life isn't easy these days, and time is so limited. No news there. I should be used to it by now. There aren't enough hours in one day, and I It's rare for me to feel fully rested, and almost everyday is a struggle between activities and rest, which is more worth it. Hobbies, friends, and sleep, choose at most two out of the three. But you pick your battles, preferably the ones that you think you have better chances at winning. Thus is the way of life. If you want something, you work for it, and you make time for it while sacrificing other things for it, no matter what happens. And that, comes with practice as well, as I've come to realize well.
The good thing about practice, is that the more you do it, the better you get at it.
No comments:
Post a Comment